Adoption: Victory Over Tragedy

Though it is always born out of tragedy, adoption is beautiful.  It's so obvious, I know, -- but this raw moment reminds me of all of the ways that I love adoption.  The way that it mimics what the redeemed person experiences in Christ -- bought out of the alone-ness and the dead end of self reliance into family, protection and love that grants RELIEF.  Absolute relief from the weight of bearing one's own life up for so long.  Bearing one's own hurts.  Protecting herself against all the hurts.  Seeking to justify your own existence, because maybe you've never had anyone tell you that you have value in just BEING.  What relief and joy.  That's what I hear in the sweet girl's reaction.   To be embraced in a never-stopping, never letting go kind of love.  I rejoice in this.  I want to savor this.  Because it is my story too.  My Father in heaven whispered those same words to me once before.  And He still does.  

Coffee anyone?

This pic doesn't capture the moment he was caught, but only minutes before this photo, I hear a giggling and gentle sloshing coming from our bedroom. What do I find? Noah dipping a soft toy in and out of my coffee cup that i left on the bedside table followed by a happy slurping of what he had soaked up. I guess that's better than yesterday when he was straight up guzzling from the cup that he found sitting a window sill. You'd think I'd learn.

Playing with Papa

What a cutie.

This was my attempt at a passport photo.  We didn't end up using this because we couldn't print it off at a photocenter...but what a big kid he is!  He's wearing his Oklahoma t-shirt I made for him.  :)  (In this pic, N- is right around 17 months old.)

Noah's Friend

Noah loves his little friend from down the street.  They are just a couple of weeks apart in age.  She's a pretty tough little gal, so she can handle all of Noah's hugging/tackling.  Noah likes to share and hug right now.  Let's hope that lasts a while.

What I say all day...

"Noah, you can look, but don't eat that."

"Noah, open.  Open your mouth. What is in your mouth?"

"Noah, spit that out.  We don't eat [mulch, lent, hair, spit up].  It's yucky."

"Noah, please eat your food." 

"Noah, do not throw your food."

"Noah, do not throw your cup."

"Delicious birthday card!  Thanks, Grandma and Grandpa Haynes!"

Anyone see the irony?

Testing, testing

Is this thing working? Just trying it out!

Singing

As I was getting Noah ready for bed last night, I was singing to him "Jesus, Oh Jesus, Do You Know Him Today?" and -- while watching me very closely -- he began singing his babble-talk with me in such focus and earnestness.  Somehow, my heart both melted and wanted to laugh out loud.  But we just kept singing together. That boy.

I Needed This Today

"...there is not a square inch in the whole domain 

of our human existence over which Christ, who is Sovereign over all, 

does not cry: 'Mine!'" - Abraham Kuyper

 

This is my Father's world,
And to my listening ears
All nature sings and round me rings
The music of the spheres.

This is my Father's world,
I rest me in the thought
Of rocks and trees, of skies and seas,
His hand the wonders wrought.

This is my Father's world
The birds their carols raise.
The morning light, the lily white,
Declare their Maker's praise.

This is my Father's world
He shines in all that's fair;
In the rustling grass, I hear Him pass,
He speaks to me everywhere.

This is my Father's world,
O let me ne'er forget:
That thought the wrong seems oft' so strong,
God is the ruler yet.

This is my Father's world,
The battle is not done
Jesus who died shall be satisfied,
And the earth and heaven be one.

Noah's First Day on the Beach

All Grown Up...sort of

1 Month

12 Months!

He's finally reached the one-year mark!  No more "growing" pictures beside the monkey.  Sad, I know.  But it had to come to an end sometime.  I think he has decided he doesn't like it anymore anyway.

Happy Birthday!

To a faraway friend, Noah would like to wish you HAPPY BIRTHDAY!  We wish we could celebrate with you!!!!!

Hanging With Daddy

Cleaning up the yard with Dad.

It looks like a desert!  But it's just our dormant grassy yard. Blech.

Well, hello Reality! Nice of you to drop by.

So, today I woke up with a sore throat.  Feeling a little yucky.  If I had an office to go to, I might call in and take it easy.  I'd eat soup, drink hot tea (which I normally never want), watch an old movie, take a nap, just wait to feel better...

Enter: My New Reality.

I'm learning.  Slowly, the obvious is dawning on me.  Parents don't get sick days.  Heck!  Parents are lucky to get vacations.  Most parents are lucky to get a solid night of uninterrupted sleep.  Parents get 8pm-10pm.  That's about it.  And if you're ambitious, you can have 5am to 6:30am.

So I'm facing this reality.  Parents are on.  All the time.  For the next 18-25ish years, I am always on-call.  I'm a parent.

Don't get me wrong.  This is not grumbling.  It's more a matter of acceptance.  Of my new reality.  I'm a parent.  And though I will miss things like sleep and forming a complete thought for the next X # of years, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Parents get the beauty of watching another person grow up before your very eyes!  --A living picture of 100% dependence and (in my opinion sometimes unwarranted) affection from this little one who looks to you for protection, food, love, play time, explanations, correction, discipline, reassurance, hope and laughter -- his very life is in the hands of his parents.  And that is at once scary and a precious privilege. 

And I'm thankful.

Because it makes me to look to my heavenly Father -- my perfect Parent -- who chose to become a parent and be forever "on-call" and make a much greater sacrifice for the sake of His children.  And He is perfect in His provisions of everything I need...like protection (Luke 21:18), food (Matt.7:8-10), love and affection (Eph.2:10), explanations (Jer. 31:33), correction and discipline (Heb. 12:6-8), hope (Romans 15:13), and laughter (Luke 6:21, Prov. 31:25) -- my very life is in His hands (Heb.1:3).

O praise Him.  I am weak.  He is strong.  He never needs a more sleep or a sick day (Psalm 121).

Yay for marriage! And commitment. And endurance.

Getting Ready for Christmas (and Noah's first snow!)

Shockingly cold Saturday.  Noah is watching it snow for the first time in his life!!!

On a freezing December Saturday, we got the house looking a little more festive.  Noah sat outside with me (Dana) while I strung one little strand of old fashioned lightbulbs across our porch.  I also tucked evergreens into our grapevine wreath on the door (instead of buying a wreath).  I LOVE to repurpose things!  It's so much less expensive and always comes out looking creative.  (I first learned this with our wedding plans when I realized that anything marketed for weddings is overpriced.  Turns out, holidays are the same way.)  So we had some unique ...er, occasionally a-traditional items.  But I figure we're in the process of creating our own traditions anyway. 

The snow started in the early afternoon.  So beautiful.  I took Noah straight to the window and then to the porch for front row seats on his first snow!  It was so much fun.  Cookies were baked.  Christmas music blasted all afternoon.  Noah and I danced (well, I danced. Noah bounced) in the warmth of the house while the snow covered everything outside.

That evening, we forged the snow and went to a Christmas festival at the local plant store/tree nursery that we love.  They had Santa (yes, he scared Noah) and cookies, tons of gorgeous Christmas trees, and a miraculously marked down (75%off!) Christmas tree that we had delivered to our house that night. 

Hmm...I wanna say it looked better than this -- like, I straightened out some of the branches...but now I can't remember and I know that the wind really did a number on those little sprigs after a while.  Anyway, I thought it was festive.

Noah sitting under a 20ft Christmas tree at a local tree nursery.  

All of us at the same nursery, next to a different tree.

And he's done.  It was bedtime after a looong day of fun.

They're Cousins...

The first official meeting of Noah and Rosy Marie.  Hilarious.

A Surprising Perspective on Abortion and Adoption from the NYTimes

 A friend sent us this recent NYT article.  Incredible.  Heartbreaking.  Moving.  Motivating.

The Unborn Paradox

"In America, there’s been tragic contrast between the burden of unwanted pregnancies and the burden of infertility."